I got the call last Sunday. My 25 year old brother had hung himself. I’m 21. It’s now Friday, his funeral was today. Since the news, the week has flown by. All I do is lay on the couch next thing I know 9 hours has passed. I haven’t gotten up, ate, done anything in that period of time. Feeling guilt for everything. Watching a new movie he would’ve liked or drinking a red bull etc. I’ve felt like i’m in a dreams-like state the past almost week. When does the dream faze go away? When will I be here? How bad is this going to be when the dream is gone? How do you comprehend this?
I’m so sorry. My brother passed in a similar way. I learned about it only two months ago too. It is so hard and I hope you’re doing alright
I don’t know if we ever truly comprehend loss. I think overtime it gets easier. I was 15 when I lost my brother to suicide he was 30. I’m 23 now. Not a day goes by I don’t think about him. His youngest who is now 18 lives with me so I get to see his face every day. Just look for the beauty in him.